More than 30 years ago, I saw, heard, and felt something that my mind, and heart, weren’t prepared to be witness to. There are official words for my long term and short term responses, but that’s not what I’m talking about today. I’m thinking about how we find our abundance again after our world crackles and we can’t see through the broken glass. There are times in all of our lives when we go through something that changes us; not little changes, but huge changes that take away everything we thought we knew about the world, about others, and about ourselves. We can’t just go back to our lives like nothing happened. These events can be good as well as bad but most of us get more shaken up by the bad ones, so that’s what we talk about.

I made my way back to my abundance by focusing on generosity. I worked everyday for all those years to soften my heart, trust in my faith, and give to others without the need to see a return on my investment. The sheer amount of failures and do-overs would fill at least one book. 30 years is a long time. The reason I chose to work on generosity is because it had flexible parameters. I didn’t need a log, or a schedule, or an accountability partner. It was up to me, and my understanding of what generosity entailed. I couldn’t fail because there was always another opportunity to be generous.

If we had to keep everything we ever owned, did, thought, or felt, there would end up being no room for anything new. Our cup would be full. Our world view would be cemented in stone. We would be unable to make new choices, or change habitual patterns. We wouldn’t be able to forgive, or to love anew, recover from grief, or laugh at a new joke. We must let things go so new things can enter. We have to exhale so we can inhale. The more we try to hang onto anything, the less we end up having.

Generosity is a fundamental way to exhale. Generosity is available at nearly every turn and applies to all forms of abundance. Generosity without demanding specific outcomes, frees us from attempting to control what we can’t control. Generosity is about us. It’s not about them. If I need to get rid of my sofa so I can get a new sofa, and I find someone that will come get it, who am I to say who should sit on it and when? I got what I needed; a place for my new sofa. Generosity is about making space for future abundance while sharing your abundance.

Now how did that help me? I had some problems around my inability to save things/people/pets/lives. Every time I was generous, I was practicing letting go. And there were oh so many ways that showed up! I practiced letting go by choice. I practiced setting burdens down and turning them over to a higher power. I practiced letting others walk their path without stepping in to save them. I practiced giving away things that I might need someday. I practiced letting others spend my gifted dollar as they saw fit.

All of that practice allowed me to begin to receive as it cleared out the over-filled attic that was my heart. Imagine a friend coming to visit. They’re invited, but when they come in there’s no place for them to sit, and they look around and say “You have so many lovely things in here. But there’s no place for me.” With generosity, we can always make room for the new blessings whatever they may be.